Saturday, June 9, 2012

Some lessons take a lifetime to learn…

Some lessons take a lifetime to learn…

This particular lesson took 57 years.

I have always had difficulty asking for help. It goes way back to when I was very young. In the midst of a large family, I always felt that I was alone. I didn’t feel anyone was there for me. I developed an attitude of “I don’t need you anyway” and “I can do it myself.”

Recently I discovered that I do sometimes need help and that I could not do it myself.

It was humbling.

I was hurt, broken.

I had difficulty doing the simplest tasks: pulling a T-shirt over my head after first pulling the sleeve over the arm I could not raise, washing my hair with just one hand, cutting my meat, putting on socks and shoes. Eventually I could, but not the first few days.

Today I was at Applebee’s for dinner. I wanted chocolate cake because it is my birthday. I had asked the waitress for a box for my entrĂ©e so I would have room for the cake. When she brought the box she asked if I needed help.  With my right arm is in a sling, it was apparent that I did. She had already cut my chicken before she served it. But, I said no.  Then as she was walking away, I changed my mind and asked her to help me. I admitted that I had trouble asking for help. She just smiled and said, “Like you were really going to try to do that with one hand?”

It was silly of me.

At the age of 57, I have finally learned to ask for help. And it is not a bad thing. We all need help sometimes.

I guess I could look at that piece of knowledge as a gift.

Happy Birthday to me!